Can You Really Find Love as a Single Parent?
Homework, carpools, and after school activities dominate the lives of single parents. Frequently, the single mom or single dad has very little time between work and family to dedicate much time to the idea of dating again. Many single parents ask themselves, “Can I really find love as a single parent?”
In short, the answer is of course. However, it is never as simple as saying those two words. In order to open up to dating and the possibility of finding love, a few things must be dealt with first.
Letting Go of the Past
Any good counselor will tell a newly singled parent, that before looking to the future, the past must be addressed. If your spouse was cheating on you, then it is obvious that you may have trust issues with the next relationship. It is important to go through the steps necessary to be able to forge ahead. If you are single due to the loss of a spouse to death, there are definite steps that grief follows. Give yourself time to go through the hurt, sadness, anger, and loss before looking for love with someone new.
Meeting Someone New
Often when a single parent becomes ready to date, they find themselves at a loss as to where to start. Finding the new Mr. or Ms. Right could happen anywhere. The key is to allow yourself to focus on things that you enjoy, not just what your children enjoy.
If you love running, then tie on your shoes and go to a park. If you like to rock climb, find a local gym that offers a training wall. By getting out of your house and dedicating time to renew yourself, become open to possibilities.
Once you are out of the house and socializing more, make sure you have a plan on what you will say if you actually meet someone you are interested in.
Give Your Date Your Full Attention
No matter how much a single parent tries, their mind is always going back to the kids at home. Do your best to be fair to your date. It is obvious when a person is not cued in to a conversation. Assure yourself that the kids are fine, the babysitter is reliable, and your cell phone is on vibrate. Invest yourself in the date. There is no need to feel guilty about enjoying spending time with another adult.
Be Open to Love
No matter how difficult it may seem initially, dating and relationships are possible as a single parent. Many times single parents talk themselves out of beginning a relationship due to their dedication to their children. While this can be considered honorable, no one else is going to take care of you better than you.
With companionship frequently comes happiness. What child can not benefit from having a happier single mom or single dad? Most children want to see their parents happy. Since it is certainly not appropriate to use your children as a sounding board, you have to allow yourself the chance to fail and to succeed. You really can find love as a single parent.